Three NOSTALGIC years

ever since I have graduated from highschool, this feeling has always been with me wherever I went and whenever. My whole life took another turn since highschool. Nothing is really the same; but not necesserily in a bad way. It's quite wierd, but when I feel that way I feel as if I'm fifty years old. I no longer feel that I'm 19 or 20, at least not from within. It's like I have died after my graduation and ever since then my spirit is flowing to see what happened for 3 years after my death! I know It's a bit hard to explaine; but this is what's actually happenning to me. They say_or in other words_ Try to make the good out of the bad, and take advantage of every single thing you have.

So what do I have? I actually have it all_lucky me_ but I don't seem to be enjoying it; because my spirit is flowing as I've said before. I can only wish that time would slow down a bit; so I can figure out things better and know how to enjoy life. I truely feel overwhelmed by the blessings of God. I know that I should be considered one of the luckiests. However, my own interpretation of Luck is to know how to realize and understand the blessings one self has

You are lucky if you can enjoy what you have. Why it's either to feel nostalgic or to wonder about the future? why can't we enjoy our present. I think if I can stop thinking about the future and stop having those nostalgic nights; I'd be more happy about my present. If we know that the past is a past, and the future is unpredictable; then we might have bigger chances in figuring out our happiness. .

I fly here and there, my spirit is in a constant hunger to return to its original home. While I do that, I try to live the best way I can. There has to be a worthy reason for our presence. We don't actually live and then die for no true reasons. For whatever reason is that, I'll learn how to live my life day by day. I'll do good things. I'll make the people who care for me happy. I'll make a point. I'll do whatever it takes to let my past rest in peace and try to live my present